More Jane!!!

I haven't posted pictures of Jane in a while so here are a few cute ones with a really long video that only Grandma Maggie will probably enjoy.

Random cute picturesJane sitting in the sun

This is Jane watching the Superbowl with Dad

We tried feeding Jane meat for the first time the other day. For anyone who doesn't know what baby food meat is like just think of putting a piece of chicken in the blender and blending it until it is like a fine paste. That is what it looks like. Here are some pictures from that experienceThis is Jane after a bite of a vegetable variety that she really likes. The next bite was the chicken




Then Laura took another shot as fast as she could and the look put an end to our trying to feed her. I think she thought we were trying to kill her.



Pure Horror!

We love our little baby! She just keeps getting more and more fun to have around. Except for the screaming in the middle of the night, but we are hopeful that she will grow out of that one day.


This is a 5 minute long video for people who want to see action shots of Jane. They actually are really boring but we love them.

Laura and I went and saw Avatar this weekend. Neither of us really wanted to at first but then when we started asking people about it everyone was telling us how good it was. And to make it even better everyone said that you had to see it in 3D which made each ticket for us almost $13. Finally, Dad convinced us while he was in town to go and see it and he would take care of Jane while we did. I have to admit that Laura and I both were pleasantly surprised. This could be because we went in with lower expectations than usual. (I have found that this is the only way for me to enjoy most movies). We had seen the previews and both told ourselves that it looked like it was going to have a lame plot about these cheesy aliens that lived on some precious material that the evil people would be willing to do anything to get. However, somehow we both liked it. Here is my critique:

First what I didn't like. I thought the overall plot was a little cliche and predictable. For the life of me I can't figure out why these big blockbuster movies that have a budget of millions and millions of dollars can't spend a little more time to figure out a way to end the movie without a mano a mano showdown between the good guy and the bad guy. Don't get me wrong I don't think it was a bad plot and overall it didn't take away from the ultimate movie experience but I am just saying that there was nothing special about the story.

What I liked. Anyone who sees the movie will be very impressed with the overall visual experience. Not only is it 3D but the whole movie is full of huge sweeping scenes that are mind blowing to think about how they filmed them. I have no idea what was real and what was fake throughout the entire movie. The Na'vi (aliens) at times looked so real I am sure that they used actors. The thing that I liked most about it was that it a great job of creating this world of aliens where everything felt foreign (the way they looked, talked, body language, religion, etc) but at the same time it didn't feel ridiculous, over done, or cheesy.

Overall I thought it was a movie worth seeing. (I am not sure if it was worth $26 or not) Now if they could just figure out how to end the movie without the general dude leaping from a flaming plane in a robot thing only to be killed by the hero's girl at the very moment you think the hero is going to die.

Jane!!!!

I figured we should let the secret out that we have the cutest baby in the world. These are just a few random videos we have taken over the last few weeks. We really think, in our unbiased opinion, that Jane is cuter than any other baby ever! Enjoy the video.

Getting back to it

Before I write about what I was planning on writing I just want to say that Laura and I have been blessed with the cutest, sweetest, happiest little girl in the world. It has been great being home with Jane. She finally has some routine and is doing absolutely wonderful. We love her.

Laura and I have been thinking a lot about a few different things. First, Laura and I really want to try and keep ourselves in good shape. It is easy as a medical student and as a stay at home mom to get caught up in the busyness of life and for exercise and activity to go down the drain. We also really want to do a better job of reading our scriptures regularly. Lastly, we have been trying for a long time to eat more healthy and to increase our arsenal of delicious meals. In order to do this we really want to cut back on the amount of eating out that we do. (Mainly fast food eating out. We probably were eating out once or twice ever two weeks, but it still was more than we wanted to do)

We have created a plan that will help us to accomplish our desires. The main reason I am writing this blog is to write out our thoughts so that we then have to stick to it.

The Plan
We bought a dry/erase calendar that hangs on our refrigerator. We keep track of the meals that we are eating on this board and we keep track of the amount of days we study our scriptures and exercise. Laura has her color of marker and I have mine. On the days we read we mark it down and on the days we exercise we mark it down.

Now, the key to the plan is what we do with this information. If we read all 7 days and we exercised 4 days then we get put $7.50 into our "date" fund. We get 1 mess up activity. meaning that if we only read six days and exercised 4 days then we still get our $7.50 but if we only read 6 days and exercised 3 days, no money. If we go all out and exercise 5 or 6 days of the week we get $10, but we have to read all 7 days. If we only read 6 days then we only get $7.50. This money is what we get to use for dates and eating out. It carries over from week to week. If there is something a little more expensive than we usually would spend on a date we have to go without, or just go on really cheap dates for a few weeks and then we will have enough.

We are not sure if this plan is going to work but we are going to try and pull it off this semester and then we might have to make changes to it.

I really think this is a genius plan and we are both excited to implement it into our daily routines.

Due to popular demand

Dana sent me an email and kindly asked me to post more pictures of her. I decided to try and be creative and made a short little video of some of the pictures we have. Enjoy.

Jane Ivy Foster

Here are a few preliminary photos of baby Jane. I know everybody reading this thinks they have the cutest baby in the world but I am sorry to inform you that is no longer the case. Jane takes the cake.

Jane's first picture. About 15 minutes after she was born.

Mother and Baby

Look at those eyes!!!!

She was born on June 22, 2009 at 12:58pm. She weighed 8lbs 5.6oz and was 20 1/2 inches long. She is doing great. Laura is also feeling very good considering what she just went through. She handled the whole experience with a toughness and a ever present sweetness that just amazed me. She is wonderful.

I have nothing in particular to blog about. So I am just going to start typing and we will see what comes of it.

Right now Laura and I have a lot of time on our hands. (Laura quite work and I only work about 20 hrs a week in the anatomy lab) We decided to check out the first season of LOST and watch in all this week. 24 episodes later I feel like I wasted quite a bit of time, but we both enjoyed it a lot. Some of the characters have changed a lot and some of the main characters, that they take a lot of time to develop, aren't even a consideration in the fifth season,(Charlie, Shannon) However, I realized that I really enjoy the show, not just trying to figure it out, but I think I feel like the characters are in some strange way like myself. I have never murdered anyone, taken drugs, been paralyzed, slept with my sister-in-law, run from the law, etc, but I can relate to many of the emotions the characters are struggling on a more basic level.

One of the main themes that runs through the entire first season (mainly through the characters of Locke and Jack) is "Don't tell me what I can't do." Locke's attempts to deal with his "condition" and trying to follow his faith in the island. Then there is Jack who is trying to keep everyone safe from the island and themselves. Do remember the scene where he is going to cut off Boone's leg in a desperate attempt to save him, and Sun tries to tell him that it is pointless. "Don't tell me what I can't do." I don't know what Jack role (or Locke's for that matter) is going to be in the finale but I think that it will be in line with how he is portrayed in the first season. Also, I don't think Locke's role is done either. He is too important to just have been used by the evil dude in black. Enough about LOST.

My wife is going to have a baby anytime this week. We are busy trying to get the apartment ready for the baby. We pretty much have everything we need, even an exersaucer, but there is still a little bit of organization that needs to take place. Laura looks really cute as a 39 week pregnant lady. Everyone thinks that she looks small for being as pregnant as she is but I disagree. She looks huge!!! I think it is because with the shirts that Laura is wearing it gives a false impression of where her stomach begins. If she were to wear a skin tight shirt you would see that she practically has a portable t.v. tray attached to her stomach. To say the least she is very cute and very ready to have a baby. We went to see the doctor yesterday and everything is looking good. She was 1 cm dilated and everything else is in place for labor to begin. We are excited. She did get a cold yesterday and has had a runny nose and has been sneezing all day so hopefully the baby can wait until she gets a little better. Laura is a trooper.

I thought I was going to be a great anatomy TA. I knew my stuff very well when I took the class and I enjoy it a ton. I learned yesterday that enjoying a subject doesn't qualify you to be a good teacher. I have forgotten 75% of what I learned in anatomy. I can't remember names of muscles and I especially can't remember the names of any of the arteries, veins, and ligments that I am suppose to know. It actually was very frustrating to finally realize how little I have retained from the hours and hours of studying I did to get it into my brain in the first place. Luckily for me it comes back much faster and clearer the second time through so I am going to try and do some of my own personal studying before I go to class.

Well, I am out of time and things to say. See you later.

ps- I don't feel like proofreading so if the following paragraphs have a lot of mistakes or if they just don't make sense I am sorry. Call me and I will try to explain it to you.

Here She Is- Mother and Daughter

May 24, 2009
Laura and I were talking about bowling today. Laura told me to imagine having a bowling ball surgical placed inside of my stomach. That is how she feels. But she looks super cute.

Nerd, Geek, Dork or Dweeb?

Ranks these four discriptive words from best to worst. In other words which would you like most to be called? form most to least. Laura and I have an argument to settle about this. I know we have probably asked you a similar question in the past but dweeb is a new addition.

If you would like you can give us some commentary on why you choose what you did.

April 29, 2009

Doesn't she look cute! Mother and Daughter! (and tree!) The tree has started sprouting buds and leaves. Sadly, it doesn't know what is coming it's way in a few months. 120 degrees

Baby!!!!!!!

Mid to Late January

Late February, maybe early March


March 29, 2009 (She looks bigger than this picture shows)

Just this last week Laura had someone ask her about being pregnant form someone that she hadn't told she was pregnant. We take this to mean that she officially looks very pregnant. Several people have mentioned how small Laura is for being less than 3 months away from the due date. I think Laura feels plenty big. The baby is doing great and is kicking a lot. We have had several belly rumblers as we were both watching.

We are in the middle of a debate on what we should name her. The top choices are as follows
1. Jane Ivy Foster
2. Lilia (Margaret or Helen) Foster - Maybe Lilya
3. Lucy Ann Foster
4. Ashley Naomi Foster

It is really between the top two but 3 and 4 are names we were discussing earlier on. Any input?

The Greatest Comeback I have ever seen

Dad, Mom, Laura and I all went down to Tuscon yesterday to go to an Arizona basketball game with Carson. Little did we know (and apparently Carson didn't know either) we had tickets on the floor. We're talking about the sideline was 2 ft in front of us. Whenever the players passed the ball in we were staring into their backside. (of their knees!) It wasn't actually that great of a game until the last 4 or 5 minutes and even then not that great until the last 52 seconds. They were losing by 10 or so for the entire second half and then they began pressing Houston. Houston went cold and we started hitting some threes, but we still found ourselves down by 9 with 52 seconds left. Half of the the crowd got up and left during the time out. I will try and recount what happened next.

I just tried to do it but I have no idea how it happened. It doesn't seem possible. I know that there were at least 3 missed free throws from Houston and turnover on an inbound pass and 3 threes and a turn around jumper by Jordan Hill for Arizona. The point is with about 15 seconds left Arizona was losing by 3 and Lewis (Houston's best player) was shooting two. He missed both and Nic Wise for Arizona came down and hit a three. Literally 15 ft from where we were sitting. That just sent the game into overtime and Arizona ended up winning by 6. It was a great game and probably the most fun I have had at a game for a very long time. Thank you Carson and Warren!

Here is a link to a youtube video that runs through the highlights. You can see us sitting on the sidelines during one part of the game. In the second half Houston's second leading scorer was kicked out of the game for stepping on Chase Budingers head. (I don't know if he did it on purpose but I can't figure out how he couldn't have known he was there. Watch the video and you'll see) click on the link and then fast forward (or watch) to 5:28 seconds into the video. If you look at the first red blob that you can see sitting on the floor seats, that is Dad. (and me :)) I stand up right after the guy steps on Budinger's head. Just click on the title of the blog and it will take you to the link.
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IT'S A GIRL!

Laura and I went to the Doctor this week and found out that our little baby is going to be a girl. Not only that but Laura is pretty sure that she has been feeling our little girl kicking the last couple of days. We are really excited and are loving life.

There is some amazing new technology that a computer can take several different ultrasounds and combine them to give you a very real looking picture of your baby. Even better they can give you a fairly accurate picture of what your baby will look like. We decided to do it and these are the pictures we got.





















Isn't she cute? Hey, it's not her fault she has my genes.

Microwave-safe Bowel

Laura was looking up a recipe the other day on allrecipes.com and this is a copy of one of the reviews that she found for peanut brittle that you can make in the microwave.

Everyone loved it and asked for the recipe. My only tip is DO NOT USE A PLASTIC BOWEL to make it with in hte micorwave, not even a micorwave safe bowel. USE A GLASS micorwave safe bowel. I made that mistake and it got so hot it melted a hole in the bottom of the bowel.

So, make sure you never but a plastic bowel in your micorwave!

Christmas and Babies

Laura and I decided that last night's FHE would be get the apartment ready for Christmas night. It turns out that I felt sick as a dog and Laura ended up doing most of the decorating and we are reaping the blessings of Laura's Christmas greatness and cheer. Check out our Christmas tree and our random decorations. (it turns out we don't have a whole lot of room to decorate with so we just had to randomly put things up)


Better than Christmas decorations Laura and I were able to go see our OB/GYN today and had a wonderful experience. We really like him, Dr. Mckernan, and were impressed at his memory of Mark and Liz and of Jeff and Angie. (He delivered Joy and Cal) Without us saying anything to him he walked into the room and looked at me and said are you a student at Midwestern? I said yes. Then he said are you one of the Fosters? Jeff and Mark? I said yes they were my brothers. Isn't Mark in Colorado now? Yes, and Jeff is in his residency. Anyway, after talking a little bit more we realized he didn't have all of the details right but we were still impressed by him.

By far the best experience of the visit was the ultrasound. I had heard about and seen a lot of ultrasounds before and honestly I had thought that they were kind of lame. You could barely see what was going on. It just looked like a blob. But when it was your wife's stomach and your baby that they are looking at it becomes a totally different experience. Not only that but the baby moves! I didn't know that. My wife has a moving baby inside of her stomach and we got to see it today! In fact she/he couldn't stop moving. Not only does he/she move, but has a heartbeat. It was moving so much the technician was having a hard time getting the heartbeat. Neither Laura and I really said anything while we were watching the baby move and listening to the heartbeat but I can honestly say that I was blown away. It was the first time I really felt like a Dad. (It actually feels weird to type those letters with them referring to me) I am going to be a Dad!!!

Here is the first picture of our baby!
According to the ultrasound the baby is 11 weeks and 4 days old which is about a week ahead of what we thought. The due date has been changed to June 19. We still think that our original due date is correct but it doesn't really matter. Laura is officially pregnant.
Even though I am not feeling very good and school has just started, we both feel that life is good, real good!

Rights and Tolerance

This is going to have to be shorter than I would like it to be but Laura and I have been thinking and talking about this a lot lately and I thought I would share a few of our thoughts and a good article that will make you think about it. As I am sure most of you know California, Florida, and Arizona all have propositions to constitutionalize marriage as being between a man and a woman. The church is strongly supporting these propositions and has laid out their reasoning clearly on lds.org.

One of the many issues that has been brought up is that defining marriage more liberally as between any two people will clash with the freedoms of churches and parents. That is what the article I have linked to this blog is talking about. (Click on the Title and you will go to the article) It's really a very interesting topic that forces one to re-evaluate freedom and what it means.

Laura and I watched a little clip of an interview with Elder Bednar where he talked about the issue. One of the main points he made was that tolerance has to be a two way street and it seems often times people want it to be a one way street. The Gay-rights movement is fighting very hard to have equal rights, but they seem to look past the fact that their fight for rights is tromping on the rights of religions to believe and practice as they would like. But that is the big question whose rights should be protected?

I am sure that after reading the article some of you thought that the Catholic church having to pull their adoption services out of Massachuset because they wouldn't place babies with homosexual couples, or a woman being sued because she wasn't willing to photograph a gay-couples wedding, sounds pretty ridiculous. Now think about similar issues but now imagine them being about race, or gender (women's rights). What if a woman today chose not to photograph a black couples wedding, or if the Catholic church refused to place children in African-American homes? I think our first reaction would be to say "but that's different," and I think that they are but the issues are similar. When should a church have the right to prevent someone from joining, or when should a photographer be able to chose who they photograph? The line is not black and white and I am afraid we are going to just keeping moving closer and closer to everyone and everything having legal rights to anything that they want. "I was treated unfairly, I should be able to sue, or the government should force them to let me do what I want" will become the way we think as Americans. I don't know what the solution is, but I what I do know is that not everyone can be satisfied. It seems to me that we should protect the rights of the largest amount of people that we can. In this case, those of us who believe that marriage is between a man and woman and cannot be anything else. This is why America is so great, in a few days there will be a vote and the majority will have their way!

Our Story

Enjoy the story of our life so far. The apartment at the beginning is the apartment we lived in in Provo, not our apartment in Glendale.

Way up in the Gore Mountain Range Part 2

If you had not had a chance to read my previous post go ahead and do that before you read this one. If you don't have time to read the last one and this one I will sum up the first day of our trip in one sentence. We hiked through some beautiful meadows, passed some awesome waterfalls, and found a nice place to camp.

DAY 2

I woke up at 7:00 am knowing that unless I got a fire going Laura would not want to get up. So I got up and with one match was able to get a blazing fire going by the time Laura got up at 7:45. Our thermometer said that it was 49 degrees when Laura got up and I thought that it was significantly warmer than when I got up so I am thinking we were in the 30 degrees over the night. Regardless we both stayed fairly warm and got a decent nights rest. This is what it looked like in the morning.
This is just east of where we slept
We had a delicious mug of oatmeal to start the day and then we were off hiking by 9:00am. We knew we had about 3 miles to the top of the pass but we were not ready for how beautiful of a hike it was going to be.This view was constantly to our left as we rounded around this valley. It was huge. I think it was probably a mile to a mile and half wide.

We crossed about 20 other streams just like this one that were running down into the valley. It was all run off from the melting snow. We had a couple of close calls but we didn't take any spills into the creeks.


After we went through about a mile and half of going through trees and little breaks into beautiful mountain meadows we started breaking out of the trees above tree line. We are at about 11,500 ft here.
You can see Eccles pass in the upper left hand corner of the
picture. It was spectacular when we got above the tree line.
















We ran into two crystal clear mountain lakes. Behind the lake on the left you can see Red Buffalo Pass. That trails runs down into Vail. Behind the lake on the right you can see Eccles pass. This trails runs down into Frisco.




This is what it looked like from the top of the pass. This is the path we took to get to the pass. This was the most spectacular part of the hike.


This is looking down the other side of the pass. We could hear a waterfall but we couldn't see it very well until we got down a little further but then we saw...
This picture doesn't do it justice. We were probably a mile away from this on the other side of the valley and it looked gorgeous.
We walked through this meadow for a mile or two. It was hot but it was pretty awesome.


This is where our pictures start thinning out a little bit. We were getting tired but we also wanted to get as far as possible before stopping for the night. We ended up going for another 4 or 5 miles and decided to stop at a less than ideal location, but it had a nice rock to sit on and enjoy the afternoon.
We sat out on this rock for almost two hours. We pumped water (tried to), whittled our sticks, boiled water, talked about life, and enjoyed the day.

By four o'clock Laura got up to go to the bathroom and while she was gone I found a tick crawling up my leg. Laura came back and said that she had also found two ticks on her. We were already dreading all of the mosquitoes that night and the next morning. (There already were a lot and it was the middle of the day) We decided to pack up camp and hike about a mile to the a lake that would provide a better place to camp.


They didn't call it Lily Pad lake for nothing. We decided that we didn't want to drink this water, so we moved decided to hike another mile to the next creek up the trail. By this time it is about 5:00 pm and we are getting real tired of hiking.

We don't have many more pictures of the day because we weren't in the picture taking mood. We got to where we thought the next creek should be and couldn't find a good place to stay. Laura mentioned that she thought there was a campground at the end of the trail which was probably another mile or so up. I looked at the map and sure enough there was a triangle at the end of the trail. So we decided to hike there.

Laura started talking to me about Turkish food and how great it was and somehow we got onto the wrong trail. We quickly realized that the trail had changed and that we were going up hill when we should be going down. We only got about 1/4 or 1/3 of a mile off track but that seem like a really long time when you are getting as tired as we were. We got back on the trail and headed to the campground. By this time our feet and legs were numb and so it didn't hurt too bad to hike.

We got to the end of the trail and started looking for the campground but we couldn't find it. I looked again at the map and the little triangle didn't mean campground it meant trailhead. It is about 6:30 by this time and we are both really tired of hiking. I am thinking that we have done about 9 or 10 miles to this point. Now we are surrounded by cabins and roads and we have no campground to stay at and our car is still 2 and half miles away. I was very impressed with Laura and her composure at this point. I was getting frustrated but she remain calm and just said "well, let's hike to the car." She also had the idea of leaving our packs up in the trees and then driving back to get them with the car. I thought this was a great idea so we hike up into the trees and hid our packs. I found the keys to the car in my pack and was getting ready to go when I realized that it was probably going to rain before we got back and so I decided to cover our packs with some garbage backs that we brought.This is the last picture we took as I was putting the garbage bags on the packs. You can't see it here but I put the keys down on the ground as I put the bags on.

Laura and I were feeling light on our feet as we got on the road and started walking towards our car. We asked a few people how to get back to the trailhead where our car was. (We even talked to a bus driver that was very disgruntled and told us that the trailhead had been shut down and they weren't letting anyone up there since midnight last night. We still don't know what he was talking about) The last quarter of a mile before the car Laura got very light on her feet and was happier than I had seen her the whole trip. We were both talking about going to Pizza Hut and drinking lots of water and eating a ton of pizza. The car was a glorious sight. Lonny had never looked so good. We get to the car and I reach down into my pocket to get the keys and I didn't't feel anything. I reach into the next pocket and didn't feel anything there also. Laura noticed what I was doing and had sudden break down of emotion. I couldn't tell if she was laughing, crying or cursing. On cue the rain clouds opened up and it began raining. This was a terrible feeling.

We decided that we were going hitch hike back up to our packs and try and hitch hike back down. Luckily, we had passed two women on a walk earlier and we re-passed them as we were walking back. They were very kind gave us a ride back to the packs and then back to our car.

We went to Wendy's had a junior bacon cheeseburger and a frosty and then we headed home. We were a little disappointed that we didn't camp out the second night. (but not that disappointed) Overall, it was very fun.

Way up in the Gore Mountain Range

Drew, Kristin, Laura, and I have been planning to go on a backpacking trip since the beginning of the summer. We were meant to go last week the 23-25 but due to Kristin's bad cough and to the fact that Laura and I both got a temp job for those two days we decided to postpone until this week to go, but without Drew and Kristin. :(

We decide to hike a loop that would go up and over Eccles Pass. It is the mountain that is directly north of Frisco, CO. We were planning on hiking 5-6 miles each day and go for 2 nights and 3 days. It didn't quite work out that way.

Day 1

This is Laura's first backpacking trip. Doesn't she look great like a true mountain woman!

The trail started out nice and flat through a forest with a ton of trees that were dead, dying, or fallen over.

We crossed this creek or other smaller creeks about 30 times and only a few of them had bridges. There were a couple of close calls for both of us but we ended up getting through the whole trip dry!


We hiked through some gorgeous mountain meadows with beautiful flowers of all shapes and colors. The picture of the flowers does not do justice to how beautiful they were.

We had heard that there were going to be some waterfalls along the trail but we had no idea that they were going to be as cool as they were. We could hear them from the trail so we trekked about 50 yards off to the side and we found...
Can you find Laura in the above picture?
There were several other waterfalls that we didn't get very good pictures of. They were awesome. Much bigger and loader than these pictures make them look.

We continued on for another 2 miles or so and found a nice camping spot. We were only 100 feet or so from the creek and there was a ton of firewood all around. It was a really nice place to stay.

This is taking longer than I thought so return tomorrow for the even more exciting Day 2 of our backpacking trip...

Random thoughts blog

I have a few minutes so I am going to post a few random thoughts that I have been having.

1. I only have a few more weeks left in Provo. My missionaries were moved to a different room in the MTC last week. We are on the 5th floor and from the windows you can see all around the city of Provo. It is a beautiful place! I am going to miss it.

2.I am really excited for General Conference. I have felt a lack of direction for what I want to focus on for the next couple of months. It feels like I am sitting around waiting for Med-School to start. Which I guess is exactly what I am doing. I am excited to hear what we need to focus on as church and as individuals.

3. The economy of our country amazes me. I am taking Econ 110 this semester and I learning a lot. I am not sure how good I am going to do on the final but I didn't take it for the grade. I just wanted to learn basic economics. If there is one thing I have learned while taking it, it is this, no one really knows what is going on. There are trends and statistical likelihoods, but no real facts. We seem to blame people a lot for what is going on in our economy. We blame people for controlling to much or we blame people for not controlling enough. From what I now understand, which is admittedly very little, our economy is so huge, well over 13 or 14 trillion dollars, no one really knows what is going on. To me its kind of like a puppy growing into a dog. Sure, when you first get it he was cute and fun to play with, but then he gets bigger and bigger until you can't control him any more you can try and fence your garden, or train him to go in your yard, or not rip off your windows, or not tear apart you porch but really he is going to do what he wants when he wants. That was the first analogy that came to mind. Sorry.

4. I am married to a beautiful woman that is smarter than me, funnier than me, more spiritual than me, a better cook than me, etc... I am a happy man and life is good!